Saturday, January 24, 2009

BALTO 5k

I didn't run the 5k today. I took the advice of my mother, father, boyfriend and friends and did not run due to my health. 

I hate giving in. 

I feel like a wimp. My mom tells me all the time that I should "listen to my body", but I don't really know what that means.  Does it mean I should not run when I feel bad? I cough all the time.  Nothing great was ever accomplished without pain.  The point is, somewhere between wussy and self-endangerment there is a line you're supposed to follow.  Apparently however, this concept is completely foreign to me.  In my mind, I've either won by completing my task regardless of complications, or I've let my disease dictate my life and therefore lost.  I lost today, and not because I couldn't fight, but because I chose not to.   My family and friends don't see it that way, and I suppose I shouldn't but since when are humans ever logical?  

On a brighter note, my medicines came in.  I'm officially medicated.  I won't back down again. 

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I don't think you gave in, You did what you had to do in order to keep you healthy and fit. No one should run a 5 K if there not well. You took the right advice and did the right thing as well. There will be plenty more 5K's to run in the future. So for now just focus on your health and get better. Glad your finally medicated. I know you have been anxious about that and I am glad you got them.
Take care and Be well...

Anonymous said...

Thanks for your comment. I do hope that you keep up fighting as well. Your comment had me in tears. I feel that my struggles are nothing compared to what you must have to deal with. But the people we are all we can do is our best to handle the situation at hand the best we can.
Stay strong, be well and know that I do wish you the best. I truly hope it all works out for you.